Archive for January, 2010

Remember, the internet is a crazy place, and people can claim to be anything they want. If they want you to believe something, they will weave out lie after lie. That hot blonde chick you met while surfing the interwebs? Could be some big hairy sweaty dude named Bruno. The Sweet, funny innocent women you met online? Could be a compulsive liar who lies about any and everything.

So, be careful out there people! Watch out for lies, and stay away from assholes.

Hope you enjoyed this cautionary tale provided in comic strip form and shaid Rant-o-vision.

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In between the lines
There’s a lot of obscurity
I’m not inclined to resign to maturity
If it’s all right then you’re all wrong
Why bounce around to the same damn song
You’d rather run when you can’t walk

I know You know that
I’m not telling the truth
I know you know they
Just don’t have any proof
Embrace the deception, learn how to bend
Your worst inhibitions, will Psych you out in the end

I know you know, I know you know,
I know you know, I know you know ,
I know you know, I know you know

Tommy Vercetti is an innocent man!Now, I know I have mentioned this time and time again, but I will mention it one more time! One of my favorite game series is the Grand Theft Auto series. The GTA game I think had the best premise? Easily answered! GTA: Vice city! It take place in the 80’s and borrows heavily from classic 80 mobster flicks like Scarface.

I already own Vice city on the Xbox, purchased when it first came out obviously. However late last night, before going to sleep, I got on Amazon and ordered Vice city for the PC. The main reason was because on the Xbox, I never could finish the thing! In fact, I was stuck very early on for several YEARS. The mission called Demolition Man had me completely stuck. Seriously, it’s a pain in the ass, and many people believe it to be one of the hardest missions in the game. The fact that they have it so early on is insane. So, I finally broke down and decided to buy it on the PC. Why? Well, to be honest? So I can cheat my way through the damn mission! See, there’s this trainer called Pizzadox that will make that mission a buttload easier. I know, I am pathetic. I fail at games, but I was sick and tired of not getting past that friggin’ mission! So sue me!

Anyway, I decided to play the game again this morning, to give the “Demolition Man” mission another go. To my amazement, I completed the mission on my first try with something like 35 seconds to spare! My jaw practically fell off my face, and I did a little dance. I finished it without needing to use the pizzadox trainer and without using cheats. I must admit, I was pretty proud of myself. Yes it took me 7 years to do. Still, I did it! Turns out I didn’t even NEED to order it on the PC since now I don’t have to shamelessly cheat.

Still, I’ m glad I ordered the PC version, because there’s a Total conversion Mod for the PC version I want to try called Back to the Future: Hill Valley, which as you might have guessed is based on the back to the future movies, which is right up there in my list of top 10 favorite movies of all time!

The iPad

Posted: January 27, 2010 in News and current events
Tags: , , , ,

The iPad actually seems kinda cool. Though it may sound like a feminine hygiene product for geeky women, it’s clearly not.

[Happy Willy - The Magical Condom]The 80’s brought the world many things! Clint Eastwoods Dirty Harry Character, a cat eating alien named ALF, Egyptian Walking and MTV. However the most epic thing from the 80’s is probably the worlds first condom commercial! That’s right! The date was November 13th, the year was 1987, 5 months after Regan addressed the AIDs issue.

Now, this commercial only aired on the BBC, because us American types are prudes. America didn’t pull it’s head out of the ground and start with the schlong sock ads until 1991, during an episode of Hermans Head on FOX.

The 80’s though is when the condom got it’s first taste of television stardom!

[Leave it to Beaver]Ever find yourself bored out of your skull? Absolutely nothing to do? I frequently find myself in that situation. For awhile I had to endure it since nothing seemed to solve it. I tried watching infomercials, Old Sci-fi movies, Modern comedy flicks and even the occasional porn flick. Nothing seemed to cure my boredom. Even hardcore gaming on whatever my current game of choice is didn’t seem to cure boredom after it settled in.

That’s when I discovered “Leave it to Beaver”, an old and classic television comedy series. I watched an episode of it one night, and the boredom melted away! It was truly amazing! June, Ward, Wally, and Theodore all make up the Cleaver family, and 8 out of 10 times they cure my boredom. The other 2 times? I remain bored, but end up falling asleep.

Sometimes I wish I was one of those people who could pick up on subtle clues, but I’m not. I have problems telling when someone is flirting with me and/or attracted to me, I have problems telling when people are pissed off at me. I hate that. A lot of people don’t have that problem. Someone comes up to them and goes “Hey! How YOU doin'” and they know the persons into them and hitting on them. Me however? I would probably respond with something like “Oh, I’m good! Thanks for asking! How about you? What’s new in your neck of the woods?”.

It makes me look like a dumbass. Not that I don’t NORMALLY look like a dumbass, but it makes me seem like even more of a dumbass. Trust me, i’m not just looking for an excuse to type the word dumbass either.

The same thing happens when people are pissed at me, Especially women. Women like to leave little clues, so that you can deduce that they are pissed at you. It’s not like those old black and white comedy movies, where the woman will run out and smack the guy with a rolling pin. Nope! Not at all, now it’s more scientific. They leave a little trail for you to follow. A trail that will lead you to the conclusion that they are pissed off. The next step is to figure out why.

Why couldn’t people who hate you just go “You are such a dumbass! I spit on your grave!” and people who are all into you should be like “Hey, let’s screw!” Then the world would be less confusing. At least for me. I’m probably one of the few people who have similar issues huh?