Archive for February, 2008

Ok, in my last entry I mentioned having an odd Dream, and said I would go into detail about that later. So, it’s now later, and I will go into it. I don’t know anything about dreams, so I can’t explain it, but all I know is it scared me awake and I felt horrible after waking.

The dream starts oddly enough with me waking up. The first thing I see is Naomi. She’s sitting up in the bed beside me, and I raise up from sleep, Kiss her and tell her “I love you so much”. Then I hear a noise from the living room. I get up, and look around. I don’t see anything, so I think..maybe It’s someone at the front door.

I make my way to the front door and begin to unlock it, when i turn to my left and see a guy standing at the bay window. He’s wearing a dark blue jumper, like the kind a mechanic would wear. He’s standing at the window, and he looks directly at me, and begins to try prying the window open with a screwdriver… I then shout out “Hey! Get the hell out of here or I am calling the cops”, and upon hearing that..the man starts trying to work faster.

When I see him trying harder to get the window open I yell out “Alright! that’s it!” and run toward the window and jump right through it, sending glass shards flying. I wrap my fingers around his neck as we fall from the ledge he was standing on, and midway through the fall he spins around and we slam against the fence. A pole that had been extended from the fence slams through me, ripping out through my chest..and the man leaves me there..starts to chuckle as he climbs into the house.

That’s when I woke up…I felt like total crap. I don’t think I have ever felt worse! It was horrible..any dream people know what this means?? O.O


Catch up

Posted: February 27, 2008 in All about ME!
Tags: , , ,

Well, I had a slight surprise the other day. I had left the house, but only for a wee while. I wasn’t gone long, maybe 15 mins at most? I returned home and as I was coming up the stairs I heard what sounded like noices coming from within the house. I didn’t really think much of it. It had been rainy and windy that night, so I figured it was prolly the house settling or something. It’s an old house, and that’s what old houses do, they settle!

So, I continue up the steps and unlock the door, now when I think back I remembered hearing what sounded like running, and I noticed it just as I was popping the door head kicks in..”That’s running…what the?” and at about that moment this guy runs out of MY house and pushes past me, slamming me against the wall…I stood there for a second because I was slightly confused. The guy bolted and kept going.

Nothing was missing however, so I am thinking it was one of two possible scenarios. The first being that he was a spy for a foreign government and mistook me for an american spy and wants some microfilm…you know, like all those cool movies..Granted, this would be the coolest scenario, but quite frankly the least likely.

The second scenario? Like I said, I was only gone a maximum of 15 mins, so it is possible that he just got there mere moments before I did, thus i interupted his thieving process. This scenario is much more likely and plausible…I will prolly just stick to the spy story for public gatherig tales though.

So, anyway..How did he get in? Well, the back door was open..although the lock wasnt broken, so I am not sure how he got it opened…However it also arises another question..Such as, why the HELL did he ram through me, when he coulda just turned around and bolted out the back door..wouldnt that be safer? Quicker? Just all around better?

Anyway, that was my excitement for the week…What am I doing posting garbage this early? Bad dream…I couldn’t sleep…I’ll tell you the dream another time, cause im in too foul a mood about it right now to bother going off about it.


Posted: February 25, 2008 in All about ME!
Tags: , , ,

After reading through my past couple Blog entries I noticed that I might come across as being bitter or angry at my Ex. This is not the case. She is a beautiful human being. A caring and sesitive soul. I am a good judge of character, and if I had ever thought her to be anything less than perfect I would not be as in love with her as I am now. I would lay down my life for hers, because she is such a wonderful human being!

If anyone were to speak baddly of this woman, then they would not only be corrcted on how wrong they are, but they would also find themselves on my bad side. I will not tolerate anybody saying anything about this woman…She is a wonderful human being. It’s that simple.

I’m not a horrible person…I’m not. I realise I have my faults, like all people do. I am a jealous type of person(Though my level of jealousy has only been a recent occurance..and I hate that I am jealous…it makes me sick to my stomach), I am butt ugly..I realise everyones opinion of what is attractive and not changes for person to person..but I am fat and ugly by any standards.

 That aside, I am not a bad person. I make an excellent friend. I am loyal, honest, trustworthy and generous to a fault. I love to help people, i try and keep my word to the best of my ability..because I sincerely believe that a man is only as good as his word…and if his word isn’t worth crap, then quite frankly..neither is he.

I believe these qualities make me a good friend, and if I was less jealous and more attractive, I believe I wouldnt be a bad romantic catch either. So, why then would someone whom i spent over 3 years with…both of us deeply in love with someone..after breaking up with me just push me aside after saying she just wanted to be friends. Why does she ignore me and treat me like some freak with a contagious disease that will make her grow a second head? “I need space” she says…Well, fine…but during that time while shes taking what space she needs…she drives a wedge between us..that after enough time passes…im afraid there wont be anything left to salvage.

Why does she do this? It doesn’t make sense to me, and she wont really talk to me..because..she needs her, in the meantime I am hurting beyond belief and deprived of the person I considered my best friend and closest confidant…It’s like I am being punished..and I don’t even know for what.

Well, i don’t know if you remember it, but awhile ago I mentioned a strange and mysterious lump on my back. Turns out that there is a very good possibility that it could be malignant. He said the fact that it has started hurting to the touch isn’t a good sign, and wants to now all of a sudden do some tests..which I am NOT particularly keen on….But, I shall do whatever needs doin’ I suppose.

Haven’t told my family this yet..because, quite honestly I don’t see the point in upsetting them at this point. At least not until I know more and can actually give some information when they ask…So, that has me scared as hell…I hate the idea of death.

On top of that I am facing my worst fear(Death is my second biggest fear), You see my girlfriend of 3 years left me awhile back. I’m not exactly sure why she feels the relationship has to come to an end..but combined with my newfound knowledge that I could very well be dying….I am pretty much living in my own version of hell…I have my two greatest fears just right there in my face.

On the upside..things can’t possibly get any worse…right?

You know what kinda bugs me? This is going to sound stupid, I promise…but it bugs me! I hate that people abbreviate “Downloadable Content” as DLC…It’s not called “Down Loadable Content”…But, hey…If people want to do things incorrectly fine…BUT! It really ticks me off when I spell it “DC” as it technically SHOULD be…I get ridiculed by people telling me how that’s wrong and acting like *I* am the idiot! Because I am abbreviating things properly…WTF??

When I was younger I wanted to be a mobster or a police officer….but then after I grew out of that, I decided I wanted to be an actor. I ended up taking drama classes and even TV broadcasting once I was in high school. I enjoyed both classes, they were fun and involved with what I so desperately wanted to do once I got out of school. I never pursued that however, mainly because the realisation was…I wasn’t an actor, I had no contacts in the field and I had no idea where to even start. So, I let that slip away.

That dream has sorta passed. However not totally, maybe I should say it’s “Evolved”? I still would kill to get into acting, but not in the conventional sense. I think it would be fantastic to be a voice actor, like for commercials or video games(Especially video games!). I would do anything for a chance like that.

You have to admire people who can do voice acting in a video game. I mean, they have to convey emotion strictly through words, they have to act without their visuals…I think that requires a lot more talent than someone in a movie or television. In fact, one of the GREATEST Voice Actors(Or Actors in general) is: Raphael Sbarge. He’s done voice acting in a buttload of Star Wars games(Though probablly most famous for doing the voice of Carth Onasi in the Knights of the Old Republic RPG). He’s also done voice work in Everquest II and more recently “Mass Effect”(Another kick ass Sci-Fi RP that might even rival Kotor, but that’s for another blog entry)..And that’s just to name a few. He’s also done a crapload of other voice works for commercials, Cartoons, promo stuff and documentary type stuff.

The guy basically is the best voice actor available and can project emotion through his voice like nobodies business. He also has a very unique voice that stands out, but not so much as to be “Wow, that voice is weird”. It was actually Raphael who originally made me want to get into voice acting when I played a game he did a voice in ages ago..I think it was Grim Flandango or something? Don’t quote me..was a while ago…but this guy has been doing voice work for so it any wonder he’s so good at it?